That certain part.....

The other night I once again dozed off on my couch with the TV on to awaken at some point to the endless, mindless drone of infomercials.
Now usually I would have just hit the switch and crawled away to the relatively improved comfort of my bed, but no - call it a moon-phase thing, or perhaps a little too much coffee at work - I actually caught myself watching one.

And a bad one, at that.

Perhaps you've seen it (or not):
The mood is upbeat, the people being interviewed are overly cheerful and present glowing reviews of the product; Then, as lively music is played in a world of prepetual sunshine, an attractive woman and a doctor ( oh, yeah, he must be doctor, he's wearing a labcoat and a stethascope!) present a new wonder pill that, despite all it's hype and fanfare is only described as being certain to (ahem, direct quote here!) "increase the size of a certain part of the male anatomy" .
Ok, I know I was half asleep, but somewhere in my little brain, a neuron sparked and I suddenly found myself wondering: Which part?
Yeah, sure.... they must have been talking about the euphamism.
But it got me wondering.
Could this just be a clever marketing scheme disguised in double-speak?
I, mean..... Hamburgers, turkey sandwiches and pot roast are certain to increase the size of a certain part of the male anatomy ( otherwise I wouldn't be paying for a gym membership, for crying out loud!).
Why, a sugar pill would certainly do that for sure, especially if some desperate fellow with miniscule self-esteem were to pop 'em like candy (Why not? After all, they say it's "safe and all-natural").
Dunno for sure.
Not really wanting to find out.
One thing is certain though: Tonight I'm gonna try falling asleep to the radio!

Hooo Boy!

Looking over my last post, I began to wonder if it was perhaps it's a little too abysmal. I mean gosh, my life can't be that plain and boring, can it?
It's like since I finally gave up and became an engineer, I started to have a bit of a midlife crisis in reverse.

Not that I was ever all that wild in the first place.

Nope, compared to some of my friends I've always been considered something more akin to
"wild lite" in the past; often the nervous voice of reason in the crowd. Keeping the bills paid, the lights on and not straying further from the path than necessary to keep my interests piqued.

Some would say that I'm due for a midlife crisis, but that would just be stupid. I've seen it done time and time again; a rapid downward spiral of self-destructive behavior with the sole intention of reminding oneself that there was fun to be had.
But therein lies the problem; those things that one can get away with at the tender ages between 15-25 or so aren't so easily looked upon (or for that matter overlooked) in the world of the 30 or 40 somethings. Quitting your job to find yourself, going on drinking binges (or in some cases worse), getting that tattoo you always wanted, or dying your hair green and trying to start a punk-rock band, for that matter, are just stupid ideas.
It's like watching a drunk old man making passes at a good looking waitress in a sports bar, funny at first....... then unpityably tragic after the laughter dies down and the party ends to find him lying alone in a gutter after falling off his rainbow.

Midlife crisis? Nope, I've got a little too much self-respect to do that.

What the heck happened to me?

I was just updating my profile...... ugh.
That's when it hit me, like a ton of bricks, no less.
I'm not really a "character" anymore, call it maturity (starting to feel a little sick here) or perhaps a new chapter in life; a lot of things have changed.
My ponytail is gone, I no longer wander about the "colorful" section of town haunting the local live music scene in a fedora and tweed coat spending the money that I make at a job I chose for it's constantly changing nature and oddball situation, and I no longer drive cars for the sake of keeping them alive.
These days I find myself driving a late model Volvo to my second-shift "life in a cubicle" type job that keeps me at home when I get there in the wee hours, usually long after the music has ended. Missing the constant physical activity of my old job -that included lugging TV's up flights of stairs and constantly lifting them to the workbench for repair- has driven me to get a gym membership and I've actually been golfing a time or two. I rarely ever wear a hat on weekdays anymore, and when I do, it's a plain ballcap. And when I do go out it's to the same bar, the one that my friends work at (and not, mind you, "friendly bartender" aquaintances, but the "Hey man, I'm having a cookout, gonna watch the game, going camping" type of friends) , to play video games, discuss politics and music and, in their words, sit and sip my beer "like an old man".
Last week I took my car to a mechanic........ a MECHANIC!
I, the guy who once in his life drove particular cars for the thrill of experiencing the glory of understanding the inner workings of automobiles - even to the point of having rebuilt cars from scratch with my own two hands just for giggles- went to a mechanic!

I guess this is what it feels like to be a grownup.

Just like starting over......

..... or not.
It's been well over a year since I've blogged last, needless to say, stuff has happened.
Work has become a familiar routine, I no longer drive the same car, and it seems that more and more of my old friends have fallen into their own lives and make rarer appearances in the stream of my day to day events.
For a while it seemed that I too would find myself in a similar situation with an old dear friend that had once been a childhood aquaintance. Though that just wasn't meant to be, the point that our similarities ended was ultimately the ending of our relationship. Life's like that sometimes.

But enough of that.
I still have places to go and things to do, friends to meet, and events to attend.... just as always. I plan to make the next post a little more interesting, but for now I just want to reaffirm that I'm still alive and able to post.